Journey to Deliverance
by mccabebabe
Summary: What started as a series of episode tags for the season finale "Red Light" has taken on a life of its own and now become a full-fledged story. Oops. But that's how inspirational Matthew Gray Gubler and Jane Lynch are. Chronologically, this one comes after the last RL Ep tag #5 "Watch Me"Spencer Reid is on his way back, to reclaim his life, his liberty, his job. And more.
1. Chapter 1

Journey of Deliverance

A CM fanfic, Post season 12

(Spencer Reid, Diana Reid, Original Character K+)

What started as a series of episode tags for the season finale "Red Light" has taken on a life of its own and now become a full-fledged story. Oops. But that's how inspirational Matthew Gray Gubler and Jane Lynch are.

Chronologically, this one comes after the last RL Ep tag #5 "Watch Me"

Spencer Reid is on his way back, to reclaim his life, his liberty, his job. And more.

Thanks once again to Aut for the drop everything and beta, and to Droogie for the medical input. All mistakes are my own.

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 _"_ _In the end, she became more than what she expected. She became the journey, and like all journeys, she did not end, she just simply changed directions and kept going._ "-R.

" _The darkest place I've ever seen was inside me, and nothing scares me more."-_ Author Unknown, but from

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 _We have a situation here, Dr. Reid, and it would be best if you returned to the safe house ASAP._ Spencer Reid read the text message on his phone and instantly was on alert. He hurriedly put his phone back in his pocket, grabbed his jacket from his chair and raced up the bullpen steps to Prentiss' office. Poking his head through her open door, and not even realising he was interrupting her in a meeting with someone, he spoke hastily,

"Sorry Emily, problem at home, gotta go!" before turning and heading towards the elevator without so much as waiting for her to acknowledge him. Anderson was standing in the sixth floor kitchenette chatting with Penelope Garcia when he saw Reid rushing to the elevator. He interrupted her midsentence and waved as he raced after Reid.

"And last I heard, the team was—" Garcia stopped short and stood alone in the kitchenette. She huffed for a moment, and then, realising that Anderson was _supposed_ to be Reid's security, she forgave him in absentia for his abrupt departure.

"Garcia?" Prentiss called across the bullpen.

Penelope carefully made her way up the steps in her too-high heels and joined Prentiss in her office. Emily rose from her seat and made introductions.

"Penelope Garcia, our technical analyst," she said, indicating Garcia with one hand, "Roger Davis, Acting Section Chief."

"Sir," Garcia offered her hand which Davis shook, while superficially acknowledging her, "Ms. Garcia."

"Garcia the newest intel has Scratch in Henderson, Nevada," Prentiss explained.

"That's just outside Vegas," Garcia exclaimed.

"When they lost track of him in El Paso, I recalled the team here," Prentiss began, "But now I'm sending them to Henderson."

"Alvez, Lewis and Rossi?" Garcia asked.

"Yeah. I've got JJ checking on a few things here in DC," Prentiss told her, "And Walker's still seconded to the B-A-P. And Reid," Prentiss' voice softened slightly, "I'm not sending him out yet."

"Isn't he still with a Safe Detail?" Garcia wanted to know. Her eyes narrowed and her brow furrowed when she saw the look shared between Prentiss and Davis.

"One more week," Davis told Prentiss as he eyed them both before leaving the office.

"Yes, sir," Prentiss said to his retreating back. She waited until he was gone then sighed and turned to Garcia, "Spencer's back on the team now, Penelope, but I'm not convinced he's ready to be back out in the field. And not because of _his_ issues either, more because of Diana." She let out a sigh and ushered Garcia out of her office ahead of her as she continued, "He can compartmentalise as well as any of us, but right now, I don't want him to feel he can't prioritise his mother's needs."

"Uh huh," Garcia agreed. "What did Davis mean by 'one more week' Emily?"

Prentiss made a face. "He doesn't think the Reids need to be in a safe house anymore."

"But we haven't caught Scratch yet!" Garcia protested.

"And Davis doesn't think Scratch is in DC, so he doesn't think the safe house is a necessity anymore," Prentiss explained in a tone that clearly indicated her disagreement with her superior's decision.

Garcia grumbled her own reaction as she followed Emily to the elevator. "Where are we going Em?"

"Lunch. I'm hungry," she laughed. "And I'm gonna give Anderson a call in a few minutes to find out what the hell is going on. Why Reid left in such a hurry."

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"How can she just have disappeared?" Grace was beside herself with worry and more than a little angry with the remaining two security agents. "You guys had one job! And why are you _here_? Get out there and find Diana!"

She had just returned at the house after her customary afternoon off and the joy she had at bringing a surprise for Diana had dissolved when she had arrived and discovered her charge was missing. She tossed her shopping bag on the nearest chair and turned, astonished—and aggravated—to find the two security agents still standing behind her.

Robert, who had accompanied her on her shopping excursion, had already raced out of the house to join the search for Diana upon hearing she was missing.

"GO!" she swore under her breath, foraged through her purse for her cellphone, which she shoved in her jeans pocket and then tossed the purse onto the chair next to the bag; not caring when the bag fell to the floor spilling its remaining contents everywhere.

Storming out of the house, Grace belatedly noticed several empty police cars parked outside the house. Evidently a search for the missing Alzheimer's patient was already underway. She was still too angry to care about any hurt feelings and the two agents followed along behind her.

"Nurse!" one of them called out as they quickened their steps trying to catch up with her. "Grace! Wait!"

Still fuming, she took a deep breath and turned on them, "Did you at _least_ contact Dr. Reid to let him know?"

"Yes, ma'am. Right after we called Dispatch and told them she was missing."

Another deep breath in and out and Grace asked evenly, "And what, pray tell, was so damned important to do that Diana was left alone?"

"Sorry, ma'am. I was in the bathroom, and John here was just making a circuit of the property perimeter."

She glared at one then the other and barked, "There's how many cops looking for her?"

"Eight now, I believe," John answered.

"Call in more!" she shouted at them. They stood in place before her and she swore again before continuing, "She's in great physical shape, you _morons_! Have you any idea how quickly she can move? She could be anywhere! _FIND her!"_

John and his partner hurried away to join the search, the former calling Dispatch on his shoulder radio as they went.

Grace took a few more deep breaths and stood at the bottom of the driveway. She looked up and down the road, thinking hard about the routine she and Diana had and didn't notice at first when the dark SUV drove up in front of the house and squealed to a stop. It was only as the passenger door opened, before the vehicle had come to a complete standstill, that she realised it had arrived and she heard the concerned voice of Spencer Reid.

"Grace! Grace! Did they find my mom yet?" he shouted as he ran towards her.

"No, Spencer. I'm so sorry! I should've been here. I—"

"It's not your fault," he soothed, despite his own anxiety. Touching her arm sympathetically he said, "If anything, _I_ should've been here!"

She put a hand on his arm, shook her head and in a now calmer tone of voice suggested, "Let's go look for her."

He opened his iPhone and sent a text message, then fell into step beside her.

"Where do you think she could've gone?" he asked.

She considered for a long moment, as thoughts of what they routinely did together filtered through her mind. The library. The coffee shop. The local deli that had the delicious little raspberry tarts Diana so loved. The—

"Oh my god, Spencer!" She stopped in her tracks and stared right up into his eyes. "She's at the park. I _know_ it! We talked about how big the baby squirrels were getting just this morning over breakfast."


	2. Chapter 2

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Back at the now parked SUV, Agent Grant Anderson was fielding a call from Unit Chief Emily Prentiss.

"Reid's mother is missing, Agent Prentiss." He cringed as she shouted her question—' _What happened?_ '—and held the phone away from his ear, still able to hear her clearly with the device a foot away from his head.

"I don't know, Ma'am. Reid and Diana's nurse have joined the search, they just went north up the road here. I'm gonna go ask John and Stu. I'll call you right back."

He cringed again as Prentiss barked "You _better!_ "

"Yes, Ma'am," he replied.

"And they're _cutting_ the security detail," Prentiss fumed.

"Yes, Ma'am," he agreed with her tone of voice.

"I'm not blaming you, Grant," her voice softened ever so slightly.

"Yes, Ma'am," he said again, relieved that he wasn't the object of her ire but fully in accord with her assessment. He was making his way down the street towards the other security officers searching for Diana.

"Those _jackasses_!" Prentiss asserted.

"Yes, Ma'am," he agreed. "Here's John, I'll just talk to him and call you right back, Chief."

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There had been a light rain that morning and Grace and Diana hadn't gone for their usual walk. Spencer took Grace's hand as the two of them now raced up the street towards the park.

It was the oddest feeling. She was still angry that Diana had been left alone, she was anxious about the older woman's well being but she felt the strangest, sweetest tingle in her hand as she ran alongside Spencer toward the park entrance. They had to pause and wait for a streetlight to change before making their way across the road and Spencer never let go of her hand. As the light changed, he tugged at her to resume their run across the road and he asked, between gasps of breath, where exactly in the park the squirrels were.

"This way," Grace indicated, steering them in the designated direction.

There was a gently sloped grassy hill leading from the sidewalk down into the park proper. Several trails branched out from there and Grace led the way along the widest one, the one she usually took when she walked with Diana. They passed several botanical displays, all of which Spencer would probably have appreciated more had he not been preoccupied with finding his missing mother. As they rounded one bend in the trail, they found themselves in the center of a display of flowering bushes. The lilacs and cherry blossoms blessed the area with their beautiful scents but Grace pressed on.

"The section where the squirrels are is just up ahead, Spencer." A grove of maple and oak trees lay fifty feet ahead of them, and Grace knew the squirrel family made their home in one of the towering oaks in the center of the thicket. As they neared the tree in question, Grace held Spencer back, forcing him to slow to a calm walking pace.

Squeezing his hand, she said in a low voice, "We don't want to startle her if she is there."

He nodded in agreement.

"There's a bench we sit on, beside a couple of the trees. Your mom likes to leave the peanuts for them under the trees and then sit on the bench to watch them come to retrieve them."

"Why under the trees?" he asked, puzzled.

"Because your mother is brilliant and realises it's dangerous for the squirrels, so she leaves them right at the base of trees so they can escape up the tree if a loose dog comes along."

He smiled at that, thinking, _Gee, Mom you are so smart despite the Alzheimer's and the schizophrenia._ They approached the last fifteen feet or so slowly and Spencer was both relieved and elated to see his mother peacefully sitting on the bench under a tree, babbling at her little squirrel family.

"She's safe," Grace said in a relieved tone, and squeezed Spencer's hand. He let go of her hand, and for a tiny instant she was disappointed only to find her spirits soar when he enveloped her in an enormous hug.

"Thank you! You found her, Grace. You're the best," he kissed the top of her head and squeezed her once before releasing her and approaching his mother.

"Hello, Mom," he said with as even a tone as he could muster. He slipped onto the bench next to her and took her hand.

"Spencer," she began, "shhhh, here they come," as the baby squirrels neared the cache of peanuts Diana had put under the largest of the trees. Delight was obvious on her face as two babies approached and skittered their way through the peanuts. Their mother stood alert, about five feet away and she eyed Spencer suspiciously. Diana was enthralled; Spencer and Grace sat on either side of her. For several minutes the three humans watched the three squirrels and then a crow flew down, landing beside the peanuts. The bird's cawing alarmed the mother squirrel, disturbing the little family who quickly disappeared into the underbrush.

Disappointed by the intrusion, Diana yelled at the crow. She rose from the bench and shook her fist at the bird, which flew away.

"Diana," Grace said in a calm voice, "let's go back to the house now."

"Okay," the older woman agreed and allowed Grace and Spencer to take her arms. They made their way through the park and back to the sidewalk along the road. As they waited for the stop light to change, Reid texted Anderson to let him know Diana had been located safely and to call off the search party.

The trio walked calmly back to the house. Diana, oblivious to the concern she had caused, immediately asked for tea and cookies at their arrival, which Grace quickly moved to provide.

"Mom," Spencer started. "Why didn't you push your alarm?"

She stared at him uncomprehendingly for a moment before realising to what he was referring. Diana fingered the pendant around her neck and appeared to be giving deep thought to a reply.

"I wasn't lost, Spencer. I just went to see Chitter and her little family."

"Mom, you _can't_ just leave. Someone should go with you, but you have to let us know when you want to go for a walk. You can't just wander away. It's dangerous."

"I'm sorry baby," she said in a conciliatory tone of voice before reaching for a cookie and making it clear that this particular discussion was over.

Just minutes after having her snack, Diana rose from the sofa and told Grace and Spencer she wanted to go have a nap. After Grace had her settled, she returned to the kitchen and made lunch for herself and Spencer. He was sitting in the living room, with his computer open on his lap. Grace could see the FBI logo on the screen and figured he was in conference with Garcia or perhaps Prentiss. She brought the platter carrying Reid's ham and cheese sandwich along with a couple of pickles and carrot sticks and set it down on the coffee table in front of him.

He mouthed 'thank you' and Grace nodded, mouthing in return 'coffee?' to which he nodded and she returned to the kitchen to make it, leaving him in privacy for his conference.

She waited for ten minutes and then Grace returned to the living room and set Spencer's coffee down on the table next to the sandwich plate. He was just closing his laptop and set it aside, attacking the sandwich with gusto.

He realised Grace was sitting across from him and looking like she meant business.

"Grace? Is something wrong?"

"It's about your mother, Spencer," Grace decided not to mince words. "She's having more and more incidents. She thought Robert was an intruder the other day and went after him with a hairbrush. I thought it might be a one-off so we didn't tell you. And I apologise for that. But twice in the last few days she hasn't recognised me. Or you. Or didn't acknowledge us and it's another sign the Alzheimer's is getting worse."

He sighed and looked at the floor. Grace's heart went out to him and she reached over and touched his hand.

"And just now, she didn't even register the danger of wandering off by herself." She bit her lip before adding, "I'm sorry, Spencer, but today is just another indication of how serious this is becoming. We were lucky, we found her pretty quickly."

"I know," he said in a very quiet voice.

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"I can't believe this," Emily fairly growled as she slammed her laptop shut and reached for her cellphone.

"What's up, Chief?" came the smooth voice of David Rossi.

"Oh, Dave," Prentiss paused to let the angry tone disappear from her voice, "Acting Section Chief is pulling the security detail from the Reids. He's given me one more week for them to be in the safe house, but he pulled the agents."

Rossi muttered something vaguely rude sounding in Italian and then asked, "Effective when?"

"Apparently, _now,"_ Emily complained. "Reid's mother went missing this morning but luckily Grace and Spencer found her before too long."

"And they're cutting back Security _now?"_ he asked, incredulous. Rossi thought quickly. "Do you want us to take turns staying with them, Emily?"

"Oh! That's a good idea, Dave. You guys are still in Nevada, I suppose I could take first watch." She pondered for a moment and continued, "Anderson's already over there. I could just make that his priority and have Garcia take over some of the clerical stuff he does here. Davis doesn't have to know," she plotted aloud.

"Davis? _Roger_ Davis?" Rossi asked, rolling his eyes as he did so. Rossi was very familiar with Roger Davis. He could hear Emily's sigh and told her, "That jagoff has been angling for a promotion for as long as I can remember and he doesn't care whom he steps on in the process."

"Well he's got one. He's Acting Section Chief." She paused to let that sink in and remarked, "Rossi, I can _hear_ you rolling your eyes."

"We will just have to go rogue to keep the Reids safe. Ain't ever stopped us before."

"I love you, Rossi. You knew that, right?"

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	3. Chapter 3

Reid was awakened from a comfortable deep sleep by a loud crashing sound. Instantly, he was on high alert and up out of bed to investigate. He could hear rain falling, pounding down on the roof of the house and almost immediately flashes of lightning illuminated the entire bedroom window.

Thunder boomed a few seconds later and he attributed the crashing sound he'd heard earlier to more thunder but he wasn't entirely convinced and decided to do a check of the entire house anyway. He started with his mother's room and was relieved to find that she was undisturbed, apparently sleeping right through the storm. The tiniest smile crossed his face as he paused beside her bed to tuck a blanket up over her.

He turned and found Grace standing next to the doorway to Diana's room as he crossed the threshold and shut the door.

"She's okay?" Grace asked him in a whisper.

He nodded. They walked to the living room to secure the windows and then made their way to the kitchen as they spoke.

"And you?"

His brow furrowed. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I'm sorry Spencer. I'm just concerned. We've had a bit of a rough week, with her taking off like she did the other day, and the security being pulled. And today, when she threw that fit and hit you when you wanted her to take her meds."

He sighed, "She was confused. She thought she'd taken them already."

"She accused you of wanting to kill her, Spencer," Grace reminded him. She saw the stricken look on his face and apologised, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought that up again."

He shook his head rather sadly, "No, you're right. The Alzheimer's is getting worse."

The outline of where Diana's fingers had made contact was still evident on his face; redness and a bruise along one cheek bore testimony of her earlier anger. Grace was convinced it was likely not the first time she'd struck him and the thought broke her heart.

He stood by the sink and looked out the window into the flashing sky. Grace stood quietly off to one side, watching him. He was in profile, the lightning intermittently illuminating his features. She could see the sadness and concern in his eyes, the strength and determination in his jaw and pensiveness expressed across his entire face. For a long time, they silently stood there; he was deep in thought and she was fighting the urge, the need to hold him and let him know she was there for him.

A particularly bright flash of lightning, followed almost immediately by a tremendously loud clap of thunder caused Grace to startle but she was even more surprised to see that it caused no reaction in Spencer at all. For just an instant, she smiled at the thought that the loud noise didn't startle him or trigger any sort of reaction. _So much for any lingering kind of PTSD or ASD_ she thought.

Just a moment later, another flash of lightning caught her attention and she saw light reflected on his face and realised that there was a single tear running down his cheek. It took every bit of strength she had to not reach out to wipe it away. Grace watched as he swallowed a lump in his throat and blinked away the tear and she could hold off no longer.

She took a step closer to him, raised her left hand and put it on his shoulder and whispered, "You okay? Want some tea?"

He turned his head and tilted it down to touch the top of hers, allowing himself to lean on her for just a moment before lifting it back up and murmuring, "I'm okay. Thanks. And yeah, tea sounds nice."

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"That was quite the storm we had last night, huh?" Garcia said as she slid into the empty seat next to JJ in the BAU conference room.

"Michael slept through it, but Henry was frightened enough he crawled into bed with us," JJ smiled, eliciting a smile from Garcia as well.

"Are the others back from Nevada?" she asked.

JJ shook her head, "No, Rossi texted Emily this morning, they're out on a lead with the local LE."

Garcia nodded acknowledgment and flipped open her laptop. JJ was going through an enormous stack of paper files as Emily entered the room and joined them. She had a take out tray with four cups in it. Carefully, she picked out the only one bearing tea, which she handed over to Garcia. JJ took one coffee, Emily took another and she then set the last one, the largest one, by the empty place next to her at the table. JJ and Garcia both gave her questioning looks, but Emily just smiled.

"You're still checking into those Scratch sightings, Garcia?"

"Yes ma'am," Garcia intoned, not even looking up from her computer.

"Don't call me 'ma'am' Garcia. You know I hate that," Emily said with a hint of teasing in her tone.

The door opened and Spencer Reid entered with his familiar messenger bag over one shoulder and a coffee cup in hand. Before he could even say hello, the three females descended upon him, overwhelming him with hugs. He accepted their affections fondly and then Emily spoke up,

"Hey, guys, better let him save some of that for Grace."

"What? Who's Grace? Did I miss something?" Garcia wanted to know.

Reid laughed, "Grace is _my mother's_ _nurse_." Emily and JJ shared a knowing look and Garcia continued the inquisition, apparently missing Reid's reply altogether.

"Does our Boy Genius have a new relationship status of which I was not informed?"

JJ laughed and Emily interjected before Reid could object,

"Grace is Diana Reid's nurse. And Spencer's new _friend."_ She emphasised the word friend deliberately, knowing exactly how Garcia would react.

Reid found himself caught up in another round of hugs and good-naturedly accepted all their attentions.

Finally, he managed to extricate himself and stepped back, "It's not like that," he tried to explain.

"No secrets," JJ reminded him.

He gave her a puzzled look, wondering if any potential relationships he may or may not ever have fell into the category of secrets he shouldn't be keeping from JJ and the others, and then deciding to humour her, asserted, "No secrets."

"I didn't know, although I suppose I should have guessed, that you'd come prepared, Reid," Emily indicated the coffee in his hand and the one she'd brought for him waiting on the table.

"No worries, Chief, I'm sure I can drink them both," he laughed as he took the seat. "Did you pull all those files I asked about, Garcia?"

"I did, Tall and Smart One, they are here in this pile," she indicated a stack of folders beside her and slid the mountain towards him. "Now. What about this Grace?" Garcia was not to be deterred.

He sighed. "It's _not_ like that. She's my mom's nurse and she's been in the safe house with us for the last month and a half so we've become," he paused to emphasise, " _Friends._ Just

 _friends_."

Garcia laughed, "Okay, uh huh."

JJ and Prentiss laughed as Reid shook his head and started going through files. They watched as he sorted each one after he'd read it, into one of three piles. In a matter of minutes, he'd gone through them all. The tallest stack he pushed aside before he went through the larger of his two remaining batches. After the sorting was done he was left with only a half dozen or so folders, which he picked up and carried over towards the smart board mounted on the wall.

The three women watched as he secured a map of the country on the wall. Once he had the map in place, one by one he went through his whittled down pile of folders and made notations on the map according to something he'd noted in the file. The women watched, fascinated as pins were stuck in place, lines were drawn and coloured document flags were put in place. Post-It notes were everywhere. He had an array of different coloured flags and Prentiss was sure each colour represented something different. It occurred to her that Reid was probably single-handedly responsible for keeping the Post It people in business. She chuckled as she made a mental note to make sure their office budget included an increased allowance for document flags.

Once he'd gone through all the files and transferred all his notations to the map, he sat down and studied his work. Deep in thought, he never even noticed when Garcia and Prentiss left to go back to their respective offices. Not long afterward, JJ was called away as well. Reid rose to make a few more marks on the map and then ran his hands through his hair and let out a long deep sigh. He was exhausted mentally and knew he'd have to give work a rest for a while. After collecting his messenger bag and jacket, he left the conference room and stopped by Prentiss' office.

She was on the phone and he waited outside politely until he heard her beckon him in.

"Hey, Emily?"

"What's up Spencer?"

"I know I've only been here for a couple of hours, but I'm just drained—"

"Aww, Reid. Go get some rest," Emily told him.

He nodded his thanks and left.

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He climbed up the stairs and entered the yellow brick safe house, heading straight for the kitchen for a drink of water. It was mid afternoon, Grace was out, he noted and Grant was sitting in his usual armchair in the living room.

"Hey, Anderson, how's it going today?" he asked as he sat down across from the older man.

"Pretty good, Dr. Reid. Grace went out a couple hours ago, your mom's been sleeping."

"How was she this morning? What was her mood like?"

"She was okay, Reid. She's been better but they went for their walk and came back and played Scrabble for a little while." He indicated the board, still set out on the coffee table. "Not very long though, she wasn't in the mood. Then Grace went out. Your mom didn't talk to me as much today as she usually does either, but that's no different from anyone else, right?"

Reid nodded. He sat back in the sofa and rested his head against its back and sighed.

"If it's okay with you, Dr. Reid, I'm just gonna go get something to eat and then have a shower."

Reid nodded and Anderson went into the kitchen to make himself coffee and a sandwich. After he was finished eating, he made his way to the bathroom.

The bedroom door opened and Diana stepped through it. She was barefoot and in her pajamas and housecoat. She took a few steps down the hallway and heard the shower running in the bathroom. Continuing past the bathroom, she reached the kitchen and found it empty. Across the hallway, she noticed a man was apparently sleeping on the sofa.

 _This is my chance to escape,_ she thought. As quietly as she could, she made her way past the living room to the front door. She glanced back. The young man with the too long tousled hair was still sleeping. Quickly, Diana opened the front door and stepped out onto the porch. _Almost there,_ she thought, _almost free of these Fascists._ As she took another step forward, she heard the door open behind her and turned sharply. The man whom she thought had been sleeping grabbed hold of her arm.

"No! No, let go of me!" she shouted at him, pulling her arm in vain.

"Mom! No, stop. Listen to me."

"Let me _go!"_ She fought against his hold but he was too strong for her.

"MOM!" he tried to reason with her; tried pulling her back into the house.

She let herself go slack for an instant and he lessened his grip on her.

"Mom, come back in the house."

She straightened up for a moment, took a breath and stared right into his eyes. He realised at that instant that his mother didn't recognise him and tugged at her arm. She stopped resisting and they turned to step back into the house.

And then Diana Reid called upon all her strength and gave Spencer a mighty shove, sending him sprawling down the concrete steps of the porch. His head slammed once against the railing as he fell and again on the bottom step. Diana released the breath she'd been holding and paused at the top of the steps. She watched detachedly as his head made contact with the step and his body rolled off the stair, and, once he'd reached the level ground, stopped moving. _Fascists_ , she thought as she made her way down the stairs, stepped over his motionless body and hurried away.

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	4. Chapter 4

Grace tossed the last of her blueberry muffin and the empty coffee cup in a food court trash container, left the empty tray on top of the counter and hurried toward the mall escalator back to the main level of the vast shopping centre. The afternoon had been productive; she'd found candles and body lotion she'd been seeking and picked up Diana's preferred cinnamon bagels at the bakery but as she sipped at her coffee, she'd suddenly experienced an ominous feeling that something was very wrong.

Not satisfied with the speed of the escalator, she excused herself and darted around other shoppers as she climbed the moving steps in an effort to get to her car more quickly. She pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and a moment later, shoved it back into the pocket in frustration. Her call went straight to Spencer's voice mail and she admonished herself silently for not having Anderson's number in her contacts list.

"Dammit!" she swore as she reached her vehicle, tossed her shopping into the front seat and tried Spencer's number again, to no avail.

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"JJ, do you have any idea what Reid was working on here?" Prentiss asked as she waved her hand to indicate his intricate map work on the wall in front of her.

"Sorry, Em. I don't. I assume it has to do with Scratch no doubt, and knowing Spence, he'll have correlated all sorts of parameters and it would all make sense. To him."

Prentiss read a few of the notations aloud. JJ followed suit and the two women looked at each other and shrugged.

"Looks like the red flags might be actual sightings of Scratch," Prentiss mused, "But I can't see any direct connections between all these yellow ones. Or the green or blue ones."

"I'm sure he'll explain it to us once he's figured out what it all means," JJ voiced.

Prentiss nodded agreement and told her, "I sent him home to get some rest. He's only supposed to be coming in a couple times a week, JJ, and for a few hours just to get acclimatised again. Looking after his mother is exhausting him, and he's still recovering from the Milburn ordeal."

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"Sorry I took so long," Anderson apologised as he hurried into the living room after his shower. He stopped in his tracks when he found the room empty. Quickly, he walked over to the kitchen, poked his head through the open doorway and saw it too, was empty. Puzzled, he walked to the back of the house where the bedrooms were and saw that all three were also devoid of their occupants.

"Strange," he mused and hauled his phone out of his pocket. As a courtesy—not to mention security protocol—Spencer Reid was normally very good about calling or texting him if he was leaving. Grant knew Grace would still be out, she wasn't due back at the house until five p.m. or so. Diana was apparently away too, and Anderson assumed she was with her son.

"I wonder if they drove somewhere," he thought, and went to check the driveway for Reid's vehicle. As he opened the front door, he saw the old Volvo and his brow furrowed for just an instant until his line of sight dropped from the car down to the ground and he saw—

"Oh my god! Reid!" Anderson shouted in dismay and swore. He leapt down the stairs past Reid's prone body and knelt next to him checking for a pulse. His heart was in his throat as he held his own breath until he confirmed Spencer Reid was breathing and then he exhaled and pulled out his cellphone.

"Yeah, Chief? Chief Prentiss! I have an emergency here. I think Dr. Reid's fallen down the stairs here. He's unconscious." Beside Anderson, Reid was stirring and starting to come around and Anderson tossed his cellphone down to attend to his colleague.

"Easy man, don't move. Looks like you fell down the stairs." He was preoccupied with keeping Reid still and didn't even hear Grace's car pull up. In a matter of seconds, she was on her knees beside them both,

"Did you call 911?" she barked.

"No, not ye—"

"Seriously?!" she fumed as she reached for her own cellphone and made that call herself. After giving the address, she told them, "I'm an RN. The patient lost consciousness, he's going to have to go to—"

Reid's weak but adamant reaction interrupted her, "NO! I gotta find my mom!" His eyes squeezed shut and he tried to speak again and Anderson shushed him.

"Oh my God, she's not here? _Diana!"_ Grace realised in alarm. She put the phone back to her ear and said, "Agent Anderson will be here with the patient when you get here."

Slamming the phone back into her pocket, she took one of Spencer's hands and softened her tone, "You have to go to the hospital, Spencer, you lost consciousness. As soon as they get here, Grant will help me look for your mom. And as soon as we're done talking, I'm gonna call JJ and the others to come and help us look for her. I promise you, we will find Diana and she will be just fine."

It was all she could do to leave him there but she knew EMS would handle his situation. Her priority _needed_ to be Diana. She called JJ and told her what happened.

"I promised him I'd find Diana and I'm looking for her now, JJ. I'm gonna start at the park. She's familiar with it and we found her there a couple of days ago when she wandered away."

"Okay. Okay Grace. Listen, I will call Will at work and he'll be able to get a couple units out to look for her too, she can't have gotten far, right?"

"The park's a block north of the house, but across a major street. I'm heading there now."

"Okay. I'll tell Will and he'll sort out where they should search. We'll find her Grace I know it! I'm on my way."

Grace's phone went back into her pocket and she started running, not slowing until she reached the stoplight at the intersection across from the park where she had to halt and wait for it to change.

The instant it turned to green, she redoubled her pace and sprinted towards the section of the park where Diana's favourite squirrel family lived.

She heard the sirens of police and ambulance behind her and was comforted knowing that it meant help was on the way, for both Spencer and Diana.

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"Just relax, Dr. Reid, we'll have the doctor look at you as soon as possible," the ER nurse told him, patting his hand as she walked by him. He was lying on a gurney in an ER exam room and grumbled although no one heard—or listened, perhaps—to him.

 _At least Anderson had listened and had stayed behind to look for Mom instead of accompanying me to the hospital_ , he thought gratefully. But now, he lay helpless in the exam room waiting to hear about his own condition, about his mother's condition, about Grace.

 _Wait. What?_ He thought. _Where did that come from_? He could hear a commotion in the waiting area and wondered what was happening and suddenly everything was black and he lost consciousness again.

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"Spencer?" He could hear his name being called. It sounded like it was far away, or in a large echoing room.

"Spencer?" He opened his eyes and started to see light, shapes coming into focus and heard his name again, much more clearly and sounding nearby this time.

"Spencer?" His brain engaged and he recognised the voice and squeaked out a reply, "Emily?"

He felt someone take his hand and heard "Hey, there, come back to us, okay?"

"Emily!" As he fully regained consciousness, the face of Emily Prentiss came into focus above him. "Am I okay?" he asked.

She chuckled and nodded, "Yes, you are." Patting his hand, she told him, "They're out looking for your mom. Anderson. JJ. Grace. Will. And a couple of other Metro PD officers. Garcia wanted to help—"

"Garcia!" Reid exclaimed, and tried to sit up in his bed.

"Whoa, whoa, easy there," Emily gently pushed him back down. "Garcia's fine, she's back at the office," Emily assured him though she didn't understand why he'd be concerned.

"No, I mean, Garcia could help find my mom!"

"I'm sorry, Reid, I left her in the office in case the others call in from out west needing her to search something," Prentiss tried to explain.

"Where's my iPhone?" Reid asked her.

"I don't know, Spencer. Let me text Grace and Grant."

She started to do so and Reid explained, "I don't know if she can, but if anyone can it would be Garcia. I was thinking maybe Garcia could track my mom's personal alarm. I mean, it can send a message to my phone, so maybe Garcia can track her using it?"

Emily waved her cell. "I just told JJ to get your phone. And I texted Garcia—" She was interrupted by the alert sound of an incoming text and checked her phone. "Garcia says she can do it remotely, as long as the phone is turned on. Where is your phone, Reid?"

A pained look crossed his face. "I don't know. I—I don't remember." He thought about it for a moment then said, "I think I left it on the coffee table."

Emily sent Garcia another text and almost immediately received a reply.

"She says it's in the house. Pinged it from her end. Can you key in your passcode here, Spencer?" Emily asked him and handed him her phone. He touched the sequence and hit send and a moment later, Garcia's reply came: ' _got it! Will update ASAP.'_

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They'd done a search of the area immediately around the area Diana favoured most and came up with nothing except a few broken branches and empty peanut shells that had obviously been there for at least several days

Will directed his five Metro officers to do a grid search of a wider circle outside their original perimeter. Then he turned to the others and suggested, "Go on back t'the park entrance an' check th'other footpaths. Maybe she took the wrong route accidently."

JJ and Anderson nodded, and turned to follow Will's suggestion. Grace stood at the base of the squirrels' tree and looked up into its leaves.

"Where?" she murmured, thinking hard. "Where would you go, Diana?"

Will laid a sympathetic hand on her arm, "Don't worry, doll, we'll find 'er."

JJ came running back towards them, Grant on her heels. "Just got an update from Emily, Grace. Spence is gonna be all right. They're running some tests, making sure there's no internal damage. He's got a concussion and a bit of a headache but he'll be all right."

Grace bit her lip and acknowledged JJ. "Thank you, that is good to hear."

"They keepin' 'im over night, chère?" Will directed his question at his wife, "Cause Grant says he took quite a hit t' the ol' peanut."

"Oh my God, that's _it!"_ Grace cried out and hugged Will.

"What?" he said, bewildered.

"Peanuts!" Grace exclaimed. "She wouldn't have any peanuts with her and might have thought to go get some. But of course, she would have no idea where the grocery store is from here."

"All right, we'll finish our grid search here, then head up along the road." Will started. Addressing JJ, Grant and Grace, he suggested they start searching north towards the commercial area a few blocks away. "I'll call inta Dispatch and have them run a few cruisers up this way. Shouldn't be long we'll have 'er back."

Fifteen minutes later, the officers had finished their wider search and fanned out along the sidewalks leading west from the park.

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	5. Chapter 5

"It was a yellow house," she told herself and walked a few more yards and then stopped. Looking around, she saw several houses but none that looked familiar and starting walking again. She shuffled along, checking each house she passed. "It was a brown house, I'm sure of it," she muttered as she walked.

When she came to an intersection, the light was green and she started across. About half way, the light turned yellow and she changed her mind and shuffled back to the corner, a definite limp to her step. She stood silently for a few minutes looking in each direction and then proceeded back down the same way she'd come.

"Chitter is hungry. I need to find the yellow house. The man fell down the stairs. Oh my."

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"Okay, it took me a couple of hours, I'm sorry about that, but I have done as our 187 asked, my friends. If you would open the attachment, I am streaming the map and tracking to you!"

"Garcia, you're the best"" JJ intoned.

"I know! And thank you! Now, go get Mother of 187, my peeps!" Garcia directed. "I don't understand how a barefoot woman in a housecoat isn't drawing attention though," she mused aloud.

"According to Grace, she's wearing a very nice looking housecoat, Garcia," JJ replied, "It could easily be mistaken for a caftan. It's the bare feet I'm concerned about."

Anderson and JJ opened the links and shared with the others and Will immediately radioed his men to relay the information. JJ put a hand on Will's arm.

"We know where she is now, I think it would be best if Grace approached her,"

"Right." He agreed and ordered his men to hang back and let Grace take the lead.

"According to the tracking, she's just a couple blocks ahead of us, this way," Grace exclaimed and starting running in the indicated direction.

Anderson, not weighted down by the same equipment the city officers wore, easily outpaced them all and followed closely behind Grace.

JJ suggested that she and the others return to their vehicles. "We know exactly where Diana is now, thanks to Garcia. Let's just act as backup."

Will agreed with her and called the men back, sending them to their vehicles except for the one officer partnered with him. Directing them back to regular beat duties, he cleared the other two cruisers and the four officers with their Dispatch then climbed into the remaining cruiser with his own partner. Will followed JJ's car slowly until he noticed she'd pulled over and stopped and he quickly did the same. Across the street, he saw Grace, and behind her, Anderson. They were no longer running and Will immediately saw why.

Diana Reid was standing at the bottom of a driveway, looking up at the yellow brick house on the property. He could see there was a cut on her temple, and her knees were both badly scraped and bleeding. The housecoat she wore was open and flapped about in the slight breeze. She was playing with her hands, and alternately put one hand to her mouth and tugged at her collar.

Grace was now only about thirty feet away from Diana, and she slowed down to approach the older woman carefully.

Anderson stopped altogether, standing about twenty feet away from the two ladies.

"Diana?" Grace put her phone away and took a few more careful steps towards her patient until she was an arm's length away.

"Is the man all right?" Diana asked, looking up at the house.

"What man?" Grace asked her, looking towards the house and not seeing anyone.

"He fell," Diana said simply. "He hit his head. Chitter is hungry too. Is it dinner time?"

Realisation dawned on Grace, yet she compartmentalised and set aside that information for later. "Diana, you're hungry? Do you want some dinner?"

For a long moment, Diana stared at Grace then she reached out with one hand, took Grace's arm and whispered, "Can I have macaroni and cheese? Is the man all right? Chitter needs peanuts."

"We can get peanuts for Chitter later. Right now, I want to get you back inside." She took Diana's hand and started to guide her across the street. Inwardly, she was still absorbing the shock of discovering that Diana was probably responsible for the injury to Spencer. At the very least, she'd witnessed it. Grace's heart broke but she knew she'd have to deal with that later. Right now, she needed to make sure Diana was all right, as she surveyed the cut on her patient's temple and the scraped knees and tears in her housecoat.

JJ stepped out of her SUV and waved.

"Look, Diana, it's Jennifer. You remember Jennifer?"

Diana eyed JJ suspiciously for a moment and then smiled, "Henry's mother!"

"Yes. Yes, I'm Henry's mother. I'm just here to give you guys a ride home."

"For dinner?"

"Yes, after we make sure you're okay. Is that all right?" Grace asked as she helped Diana climb into the vehicle. JJ got back into the driver's seat and texted a thank you to Will for all his help. Anderson poked his head through her window,

"I'm gonna catch a ride back to the house with Will, okay? Don't wanna leave it unattended too long, since we never even locked up or anything."

JJ nodded and after Anderson left, checked her rear view mirror. Diana had closed her eyes and leaned back into the seat. She made eye contact with Grace who nodded, and then JJ shifted into gear and drove to the hospital.

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"They have your mom, Spencer. She's safe, she's downstairs in the ER," Emily told him and instantly she saw the tension in his face dissipate. He was lying in the hospital bed in the patient room they'd moved him to earlier. A relieved sigh escaped his lips and he favoured Emily with a smile. She relayed the information she'd received from Grace less than an hour ago.

"She's being treated for some bad scrapes on her knees, looks like she might have fallen. She's got a pretty deep cut on her temple as well. They're cleaning that up, and they're going to keep her at least overnight because she can't remember what happened."

He broke eye contact with Emily and looked away, out the window.

"Spencer. You okay?" she ventured. He nodded but didn't look at Emily. A nurse opened the door and brought in Reid's dinner, setting the tray down on the table next to his bed. She caught Prentiss' eye and they exchanged a look which Prentiss had no trouble interpreting. She let out a sigh and told him, "I should go, you need to eat and I need to check on the team."

He acknowledged them with a nod, still staring out the window. Prentiss and the nurse both left, shutting the door behind them.

Reid thought about the past few weeks. Images raced through his mind: his mother laughing at some stupid joke he'd made, smiling triumphantly as she beat him in a game of Scrabble, her eyes lighting up as she told him about Chitter the squirrel and her babies. A smile formed across his lips as he remembered the discussion they'd had about _his_ life during one of her lucid periods a few days ago.

 _"_ _Spencer, I love you for looking after me. You know that, baby."_

 _"_ _Yeah mom, I know."_

 _"_ _And I know I told you never to leave me again."_

 _"_ _I won't, Mom."_

 _"_ _I know you won't honey, in here," she'd pointed, putting a hand to his heart, "But I know you've put your own life on hold to look after me."_

 _He'd tried to shake his head no._

 _"_ _I won't have it, Spencer. I want you to promise me something."_

 _"_ _Anything, Mom, you know that."_

 _"_ _I want you to have a life too. Not just to look after me. I want you to be happy in your own right, Spencer. To find love and live a happy life with your own children." He remembered the look in her eye, as she remembered a favourite poem, "'Love comforteth like sunshine after rain.'"_

 _"_ _Shakespeare."_

 _"_ _Of course. He knew of what he was speaking. And so do I. Promise me, Spencer."_

 _He'd nodded._

 _"_ _I can't stay in your apartment anymore. I need you to find me somewhere else to live. Where you can come and see me whenever you like, but you won't be burdened with my actual care every minute of the day. I won't have it, Spencer. I won't."_

He drifted back into the present and thought about her arguing with him about her medications. He remembered her throwing them back in his face and screaming at him and at Grace when she thought she'd already taken them. He remembered Grace telling him that Diana had gone after Anderson with a hairbrush thinking he was an intruder. He remembered coming back from seeing Dr. Flanagan and finding that Diana had wandered off unsupervised. He remembered seeing her attempting to leave again, just a few days later. He remembered the look in her eyes, the blank stare that told him she didn't recognise him. He remembered their tense standoff on the porch. He remembered falling down those stairs. And finally, he remembered how and why it happened.

'"Oh my god," he said aloud.

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	6. Chapter 6

It was late; long past the hospital's posted visiting hours but Grace quietly opened the door to the patient's room and tiptoed in. He was lying in the bed, flat on his back and for a moment she watched as he slept. His dinner tray, long since cold, remained untouched on the table, she noted, frowning.

Tentatively, she stepped closer to him and pulled his blanket up over him. Grace knew Spencer chilled easily and he'd apparently tossed and turned in his sleep enough to dislodge the cover. As she tucked it in by his side, she heard him groan and mutter what sounded like 'no, mom'. For a moment, she debated whether to wake him and he rendered that decision unnecessary, opening his eyes when he sensed her presence.

"Grace?" His instinct kicked in and he sat up immediately, "Is my mom okay?!"

"Shh, yes," she told him, pushing him back down onto his bed. "Your mother is sleeping comfortably, upstairs in her room."

"Good. Thank you," he told her, as he sat up again, taking her hand in his to forestall her when she moved to make him lie back down. "No, I'm okay."

"Sorry if I disturbed you, I just needed to know if you were all right." Grace confessed. He couldn't see in the low light, but his mother's nurse was blushing. It occurred to her that he was holding her hand and her heart soared at the thought.

"I did disturb you, I'm sorry," she began.

"It's okay," he waved off her apology. "I've been sleeping on and off since I got here. Hospitals are boring if you're the patient."

She chuckled.

"I'd much rather talk to you," he told her, sending her heart soaring anew. He was still holding her right hand in his left.

"Well, we do need to talk, Spencer. Emily told you, I'm sure, that we have to leave the safe house by the end of the week."

Reid nodded and affirmed, "Yeah, she did. I guess I'll have to move my mother back to my apartment," he began.

"She needs to be in a care facility, Spencer. I hate to sound like I'm—" she paused when she saw him holding up his other hand to interrupt her.

"I know, Grace. Even my mother says that now. It's funny, before this all happened," he made a face and elaborated, "before Mexico, before my stupidity got me in so much trouble—"

"Stop! You were trying to _help_ your mother, Spencer. There was nothing _stupid_ about it."

"Well back in January, before I even ever went to Mexico, I was telling Emily that perhaps I'd made a mistake bringing my mother home to live with me. _Cassie_ said so. _Emily_ said so. It was too much. I think I probably knew it wasn't the best idea but I had to try."

"Of course you felt you did," she said in a conciliatory tone, stroking the hand that held hers with her thumb as she spoke. "Perfectly understandable."

"But Cassie said Mom was suffering. I wasn't there all the time, and she was missing the programs that the home provided for her." He paused to take a breath and Grace encouraged him.

"You did what you thought was best. You tried, Spencer."

He nodded in agreement. "Mom made me promise to never leave her again when I got back from talking to Cat at Mount Pleasant."

"But she didn't mean you have to stay by her side every moment for the rest of her life," Grace suggested.

"No. Not at all," he acknowledged. "Earlier this week, when she was having a really good day, she actually wanted me to find her a care facility nearby. And she also made me promise her," he paused.

Grace assumed he was referring to the care facility and made a confession. "Spencer, I need to tell you something."

His eyebrows rose in surprise but he didn't interrupt her.

"JJ and I were talking earlier this week. She'd been discussing it with Cassie before," Grace drew a breath, "Before Cassie was killed. They would never have moved her without discussing it with you first, Spencer, but they were exploring options for your mother. Cassie actually found a really great place right here in DC. And as it turns out, I know a couple of the nurses who work there."

She stopped talking; hoping this line of discussion hadn't angered Spencer but he was listening to her attentively and it encouraged her.

"It's not far from your apartment, actually, and there's a metro stop right next door."

"I should go visit the place," he stated and almost immediately amended, " _We_ should go visit the place." He let go of her hand as he got up out of the bed and Grace couldn't help but laugh.

"It's after eleven! We can't go now," she said in a shaky voice.

He laughed, and told her, "Of course not. I just wanted to get out of bed. Go for a walk. Think that's allowed?" he asked.

"Where to?" she countered.

"I'm hungry. I was hoping the hospital coffee shop might be open."

"It's not. And I don't think the nursing staff would appreciate you being out of your bed, traipsing around the hospital at this hour," she laughed.

He opened the room's door and stepped out into the hallway and then he realised he was wearing a hospital gown and not much else and changed his mind, scurrying back into his room. Grace, who had silently admired the view, now spoke up.

"Get back into your bed," she directed, "I will go get you a sub or something. Back in ten minutes!"

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"Let's go get some lunch," Spencer invited as he and Grace left the Hetherington Home after their tour the following morning. They had spent several hours checking out the facility: seeing the grounds, meeting the administrator and several nurses and other staff. Grace introduced Spencer to two nurses with whom she'd gone to nursing school and they'd instantly taken a liking to him. He'd been assured that visiting hours could be accommodated for his erratic schedule, depending on Diana's condition. Reid was elated that the home was just three subway stops away from his own apartment.

As it turned out, the administrator was an old friend of Mateo Cruz' and he made a few calls and arranged for a space to open for Diana for as soon as the coming Monday, if she was released from the hospital by then.

They walked down the street to a cozy little Italian restaurant and had Caesar salads and garlic bread for lunch, sharing a bottle of dry Italian red wine and some conversation that had nothing to do with nursing or profiling. Afterwards, they walked off their lunch by visiting the park across the street.

"I can't believe they made me stay in the hospital for another whole day," Spencer complained, as two little boys on bicycles wheeled by them. They stepped aside to let the children pass.

"Oh stop," she laughed, "It was for your own good. They can't just let a concussion patient go home because _he_ thinks he's all right. You're _not_ an MD, despite being Dr. Reid."

She paused as another bicycle passed them and the small boy on it yelled, "Hey! Wait up! Wait for me!"

"Nice try, though," she teased. He laughed at her joke and started walking off the groomed trail towards a stand of trees. She followed him in silence for a few minutes as they delved further into the park, away from other people. He came to a stop by a park bench. She wondered why and looked around, quickly noticing that his attention was drawn to two little squirrels at the base of a large oak tree.

"I hope there's squirrels in the trees on the grounds of Hetherington," Grace said.

"If there's maples and oaks, there'll be squirrels," Spencer laughed. "Mom will like that."

He sat down on the bench, and looked up at Grace who was still standing. "Think they'll release Mom from the hospital today?"

"Probably. Yes," came Grace's reply. "And Grant and Robert cleared the safe house yesterday. JJ still has a set of your apartment keys, they took everything over last night."

"I made my mother a couple of promises, Grace," he told her in a quiet voice. "I think she'll really like Hetherington's. It'll give her a normal sense of routine again. There are people her own age there, she can make some friends again. And I can see her anytime."

She nodded and asserted, "Maureen and Iris will look after her, Spencer." He smiled at the thought of Grace's two friends and hoped his mother would like them as much as he did. He looked out at the park, deep in thought for a moment before the sound of Grace's question gained his attention.

"What did you promise your mom, Spencer?"

"I promised her I'd find her a good place to live, and that I'd be able to visit her more than I did when she was in Las Vegas."

Grace smiled an acknowledgement, "I think Hetherington's could be that place."

"And I promised her something else," he began, rising to his feet to address her directly. "Grace, you've been a perfect, wonderful nurse for my mom. I could not have gotten a better caregiver for her. But,"

Her eyes grew wide.

"I'm afraid," he forged ahead, while he still had the courage he'd worked up to say what he wanted to, "I'm afraid I'm gonna have to terminate your contract as Mom's caregiver."

He heard her gasp. Tears sprang to her eyes and she reached out to grab hold of the park bench to steady herself and she sank down into it.

For a moment, her reaction puzzled him and he remained silent; brow furrowed and biting his lower lip.

"Can I, can I ask why?" she asked in a tiny voice. She'd known this was coming, with his mother going into a home but it still hit rather harder than she'd expected. Part of her suspected it was because the daily contact with Spencer would be severed too. But she already had a plan in place regarding Diana.

The realisation sunk in that she'd misunderstood his intentions and he scrambled to make things right. "Oh. Oh no. I'm sorry. It's nothing you did." He knelt down on one knee in front of her and searched out her face, wanting to make eye contact. "I'm sorry Grace!" She broke eye contact and stared at the ground. "What I meant is," he paused and swallowed hard then continued, "It's unethical to for someone to be dating an employee."

He stopped again, wondering whether he was making things clearer or muddying them further. As his words, and his actual meaning sunk in, he decided to jump in with both feet and explained, "I promised my mom, Grace. I promised her that I'd have a personal life of my own. And, well, there's no one else I'd rather try to do that with."

He swallowed again and waited, his own eyes trained on the ground before him. He heard her sharp intake of breath. Still precariously balanced on one knee in front of her, he lifted his head to look at her and as he did so, she leaned forward and slid both her arms around his neck. He dropped his other knee to the ground to stabilize his positioning and drew his arms around her waist. Their faces were mere inches apart and again he sought out eye contact.

"Spencer," she breathed, leaning forward until their foreheads touched. He closed his eyes, bent his head and gently touched his lips to hers. Her lips parted under his and he heard a small moan. Encouraged, he deepened the kiss, pulling her closer against him and sending his tongue to gently explore her mouth. He fought the urge to smile, not wanting to spoil it, but his heart soared when he felt her fingers tangling through the mane of his hair. They were both lost in the moment, Spencer was wondering if his heart might just beat right out of his chest. They kissed for several minutes, amid the tranquility and silence of the park, time stood still around them. They were interrupted by a sudden commotion behind them.

Two squirrels sat on separate branches of the same tree and chattered vociferously. Grace wasn't sure if they were angry with each other, or with her and Spencer. She reluctantly broke off the kiss with Spencer and laughed, indicating their audience.

"I feel like they're spies my mother sent," he laughed. Rising to his feet, he extended his hand to help Grace up. He kept holding her hand as they walked through the park back towards the street.

"So, I'm actually fired?" she said, in a strangely light tone.

"Not _fired._ Released from your contract. Actually, I guess that means I'll have to give you a severance for terminat—"

A jarring sudden movement interrupted him. Grace had stopped in her tracks and tugged at his hand, causing him to turn towards her where he found his words cut off by her kissing him for a long moment before stepping back and saying,

"Oh you don't get rid of me that easy, Dr. Reid." She was trying to sound serious but dissolved into giggles. "I start work at Hetherington's next week. Orientation's on Tuesday, first shift is Thursday."

"You," he stopped, looked at her incredulously and then roared with laughter himself. Gathering her up in his arms, he kissed her soundly again, then held her a foot or so away from him and said, "My mother will be so happy about this."

"Your mother will be?" she asked, lifting an eyebrow.

"Almost as happy about it as I am," he assured her.

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	7. Chapter 7

"Just a few more steps, Mom, we're almost there," Reid encouraged as they made their way up the staircase to his apartment. She'd been discharged from the hospital and Spencer was set to have her at home with him for the last two nights before she entered Hetherington's.

He fumbled with the key in the lock, finally unlocked it and then threw open the door. It felt strange, as he crossed the threshold, to be in his own apartment for the first time in almost six months, save for the quick trip he'd made with JJ to retrieve a few items the day of his release.

Diana made her way to the sofa and sat down, picking up her scrapbook from the table before her. She was engrossed in memories, old photographs and looked up when his shadow crossed the page. Spencer set a cup of her favourite tea down on the table in front of her and then sat next to her on the sofa.

He sipped his own tea and spoke softly, asking her yet again, "You're sure about Hetherington's, Mom?"

She swallowed a mouthful of tea and set the cup back down on its saucer. "Now, Spencer, we _had_ this conversation. I love you, baby, but you cannot spend the rest of your life looking after me."

As he started to protest, she shushed him yet again and continued, "I had Jennifer and Grace find out all about Hetherington's, Spencer. I'm going to like it there. Even when I'm hating it, I'm going to like it there."

He was inwardly grateful that she was having a lucid day and seeing life logically.

"It's just a couple blocks from here, I can visit anytime."

"And Grace."

His brow furrowed. "Grace will actually be working at Hetherington's, Mom. You'll get to see her too."

"I mean the two of you. Together."

He gave her a puzzled look.

"Oh, _please_ , Spencer. Don't give me _that_ look. I may have Alzheimer's but I'm not stupid. I can _see_ how you two are together. You are together?" Before he could say anything, she continued, "You _should_ be together."

She patted his knee, picked up her teacup and had another drink before setting it back down and turning to face him.

"You promised me," she stated simply.

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Spencer settled Diana into bed for the night then padded out to his living room. He walked around the room, running his hand along a bookshelf and stopping to take in the sight of his chess set, laid out on the small table he'd purchased especially for it. He picked up the white knight, eyed it in his hand for a long moment before clenching it tightly and carefully setting it back into place.

Moving to the window, he reveled in the view, people walking along the street below, and shops along the main street past the intersection and the park and the library off to the south. It was dark, nighttime, but the streetlights lit up the city. It was a far cry from the prison walls but, more importantly, it was _his_ view. The freedom to move around, to look out a window and see the sky—whether it was overcast or clear blue or filled with stars as it was this night—on his _own_ schedule was a welcome relief and he stood at the window for a long time just revisiting the journey that had brought him to this point.

He thought about everything he'd been through: how difficult it had been wondering how his mother was and that he couldn't do anything for her, how scared and isolated he'd felt the first while in Milburn, how he'd feared for his own life after Luis had been killed. He thought about how helpless he'd felt, unjustly trapped in prison while the real killer of an innocent woman was loose. He thought about the nightmares, and the fear he'd never again be free; that he'd end up dying at the hands of actual criminals before he'd be able to clear his name, or see his mother again; before he could reclaim his life, his spot on the team and his friends there; before he'd find love and live his own life. He thought about the consultations with Dr. Flanagan: how she'd made him see that he'd conquered those fears; overcome the nightmares; vanquished the flashbacks and how JJ had helped him dispel any thoughts he had that he was becoming a psychopath like the other inmates. He was a victim of circumstance as Morgan had pointed out. And he'd played a central role in proving his own innocence and securing justice for Nadie.

Drawing the curtain shut, he made his way over to his desk and sat down. He flipped on the banker's lamp and drew one of his reference books close. It was a massive textbook about criminal psychology and he sat back in his chair, and took in the sight of his workspace, relishing the simple fact that he was even able to do so. He reread the book. It took him about seven minutes to accomplish and he closed it with a satisfied smile, happy to be back in his comfort zone.

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" _Spencer! SPENCER!"_

He awoke with a start, hearing his name and sprang into action when the realisation hit that his mother was calling for him. He'd fallen asleep on the sofa and was now instantly on high alert as he sprinted to the bedroom where his mother had been sleeping.

She was sitting up in bed, panting heavily and obviously upset. He raced to her side. This was new, she hadn't been suffering nightmares—that was _his_ domain, he thought ruefully—and he held her in his arms as he spoke comfortingly,

"Mom, Mom. It's all right. I'm here. Were you having a bad dream?"

She shook her head and clung to him.

"I'm so sorry, Spencer."

"Mom! You have nothing to be sorry for," he assured her.

They'd had another unfortunate episode earlier in the day. Diana had awakened that morning feeling disoriented and frightened and Spencer had a difficult time calming her and making her feel safe. She'd thrown the tea tray—with the cups and plates still on it—at his head and fled to the bedroom, all the while yelling that he was holding her prisoner. For several minutes, she'd holed up in the bedroom and would not talk to him or let him in. He'd waited her out. Once she'd fallen asleep a short while later, he'd peeked in on her to make sure she was all right and then he cleaned up the tea set and dressed the cut on his temple.

"Yes, honey, I do." She traced the bandage on his head and a bruise on his cheek with her finger and started to cry.

"Mom, don't."

"This," she moved her finger gently along the bruise below his left eye, "I did this to you." She caught her breath, hiccupped and put her hand to her mouth to stop crying.

He made eye contact with her and shook his head, "Mom it wasn't malicious. It wasn't intentional. And it's nothing, just a little mark."

"Spencer. This wasn't the first time!" She was searching his eyes and he kept his face neutral. Her eyes suddenly widened in horror. "Oh my god, the stairs! The stairs!" She burst into a fresh bout of tears and hid her face in her hands.

"Mom, please—"

"Honey." She lifted her face to meet his eyes. " _I_ pushed you down those stairs!"

"You were having a bad day, Mom. It's the Alzheimer's. I'm sure you didn't mean—"

"I hurt you. And it's not the first time." She wrung her hands together and looked down at the blankets for a moment, wiped at her eyes with her hands and then met his gaze again. "And you're not the only one I've hurt, Spencer!"

He enveloped her in a hug and spoke soothingly in low tones, rocking her gently until she fell asleep. After he laid her back down on the bed, he moved back into the living room and retook his position on the sofa.

His thoughts kept him awake long into the night but it had nothing to do with prison time or PTSD.

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"And the games room is right this way, Diana," Iris held her new patient's arm as they made their way through the first of several recreation rooms. "We found that most of the residents preferred a separate, quiet area for reading and writing, and we established a library for that. It's this way."

Diana followed her into the library and gasped, instantly falling in love with the cushioned chairs, rows and rows of bookshelves and the old-fashioned ambience. She made her way through the room to the back, where a floor to ceiling stain glassed window dominated.

"It's breathtaking!" Diana exclaimed, "I'm going to spend so much time here!" She told Iris, and asked, "I hope that's allowed."

"Of course it is!" Iris let her explore the room a little more before continuing their tour. Next, they visited the television room, which Diana showed no interest in and then they went on to the dining room where Diana once again exclaimed delight at the décor and set up.

"Your son tells me you're a big fan of classical literature, Diana."

"I am!" she enthused. "And the library looks like the perfect place to appreciate it."

"You will make a couple of quick friends here, then, Diana. There's Rhonda and Lois and Albert all of whom love Shakespeare and the classics too."

"And Grace," Diana mentioned.

"And Grace," Iris agreed. "She's not here today, and neither is Maureen but the three of us all went to nursing school together Diana, and we're old friends. I'm sure you'll love Maureen too. And Grace will be here tomorrow."

Beaming, Diana followed Iris back to the common room where several of the residents were seated around tables, playing cards or reading newspapers or just conversing. Iris steered her towards one pair and made introductions, "Rhonda, Albert, this is Diana. She's a classic literature professor. Diana, this is Rhonda and Albert."

They quickly invited Diana to join them at the table and Iris was astounded to hear them immediately launch into a discussion about _King Lear_. Smiling, she made her way over to the teacart and got some tea for the trio. Placing cups before each of them, Iris asked,

"Diana, are you okay to sit here with these two for a few minutes? I just want to check on something before we go on to your room."

"We'll take good care of her, Iris," Rhonda promised. Diana and Albert were engrossed in a discussion of similes and metaphors and Rhonda gestured to Iris, whispering, "I think it'll be all right."

Iris rushed into the kitchen and spoke to the head chef there for a moment then quickly made her way back to the dining room. She gave Diana a few more minutes to chat with her new friends and then she gently coaxed Diana to come with her to see her new room.

Spencer was waiting for them. He'd brought her scrapbook and a few other items and hung her clothes up in the closet.

"So, how did your tour go, Mom?"

"It was wonderful, honey. My friends Rhonda and Albert and I want to do a reading together."

"Shakespeare?" he asked indulgently.

 _"_ _King Lear_ ," she specified.

"That didn't take long," he laughed. "Look Mom, your window here."

She made her way to the window and looked out onto the yard beyond. "I hope there's squirrels in those trees. That one over there," she pointed out an old oak. "Are we allowed in the yard?" she directed her question to Iris.

"Absolutely. Hopefully, every day Diana, weather permitting."

"I'm going to love this place," Diana said, setting her sweater down on the dresser. She sat on the edge of the bed and took off her shoes. "I'm tired, I'm just going to have my nap now."

Spencer's eyebrows rose. He exchanged a smile with Iris, bent down and kissed Diana on the cheek and told her to have a good nap.

"I'm so glad you're liking it here, Mom. I'll be back to see you whenever I can. Which is going to be a lot more than it used to be in Las Vegas!"

She squeezed his hand, and then she laid down and shut her eyes, quietly thanking him for bringing her home.

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	8. Chapter 8

Spencer Reid straightened his tie and picked an imaginary lint fluff off his jacket and looked around the restaurant towards its entrance again. It was almost half an hour past the time they were supposed to meet for dinner and he hoped he wasn't being stood up. Anxiously, he took his iPhone out of his pocket and checked to see if he'd somehow missed a call or text. There was none indicated. Sighing, he put the phone away and wondered if he'd been too forward. He thought back to their walk in the park. Had he been too aggressive? He dismissed that idea as he recalled that _she_ had leaned into _him_ first. But he'd responded. Was that too forward? His mind raced as he tried to rationalise his actions. He moved one of the glasses at his place setting into position, and seconds later again moved it a fraction of a centimeter. While he was concentrating on that, the chair across from him moved and Grace slid into it before he could get up to hold it for her. He rose and belatedly held her chair as she sat and then retook his own seat.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, Spencer. Orientation was right on time but I went to see your mother after and I completely lost track of time. Totally my fault. Please forgive me."

She was wearing a simple but lovely blue print dress that effectively set off her blue eyes and fiery strawberry blonde hair. A stylish belted sweater, in several shades of blue, covered her arms. He smiled at her and instantly forgave her tardiness.

He wanted to ask her about her day, but his mouth didn't cooperate. Instead, he asked, "How's she doing? How was her day?"

Grace smiled. "She _loved_ it, Spencer. I'm not sure what she did earlier in the day with Iris and Maureen, but she was smiling and laughing when I got there. And we went for a walk on the grounds. That reminds me, I'm gonna have to remember to get her a supply of peanuts. Chitter and family, version two point oh, are in the oaks just outside her window!" she enthused.

Spencer smiled but Grace noted something was off. The smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Her brow furrowed and her line of conversation changed abruptly. "Hey," she reached out with one hand and touched his arm, "What's wrong, Spencer?"

"Can you take off your sweater?" he asked her.

Her eyebrows rose. "I—I could but it's kind of chilly," she stammered and stalled.

"Just for a minute," he asked.

"Spencer."

"Please."

Sighing, she moved to shrug off the garment and tried not to raise her right arm as she did so. He watched intently as the sweater came off and Grace laid it over her right arm.

"Okay?"

"Can I have it please?"

"Spencer—"

"Grace, please." He reached over and took the sweater from her arm, gently, because he _knew._

She sighed resignedly as he exposed her forearm. It was covered with an ugly dark bruise, the shape of fingers evident, deep purple with some yellow and lighter purple around the edges; a bruise that had clearly been there for several days. Tears sprang to her eyes. She lifted her eyes to meet his gaze and saw tears forming in his eyes as well.

"My mother did that, didn't she?"

"Spencer, please."

"Grace. Don't lie to me. Don't hide this! Not from me."

"I'm sorry, Spencer. She didn't mean—"

"I _know_ that. It doesn't make it right."

He reached out and touched the bruise, softly running his fingers along it and shook his head sadly.

"I'm so sorry she did this to you."

"Stop, Spencer. It isn't your fault. And it isn't _her_ fault either. This kind of thing happens to nurses all the time."

"When did this happen?"

"She wanted to go for a walk. It was over a week ago."

"But you guys went for walks every day," he started, puzzled.

"Not at two-thirty in the morning," Grace replied. She held up her hand to shush him in advance and explained, "It was the middle of the night Spencer! You were _finally_ sleeping through nights without being interrupted by nightmares. I wasn't going to let a little tussle with your mother ruin that."

"Little tussle? Look at this!" He drew a breath and calmed himself.

"Please, Spencer, it's really nothing in the grand scheme—"

"She hurt you. It was another indication that the Alzheimer's is taking hold," he realised. He changed his tone, softening a little, "It's getting worse. And it bothers me that she hurt you and you kept it from me."

Grace nodded, realising where he was coming from, "I'm sorry, Spencer. It wasn't my intention to hide her worsening condition from you, I just wanted to spare you the worry."

He rose from his seat, and moved to help her up from hers. She stood up and he helped her put the sweater back on then seated her again. After retaking his own chair, he reached out and took her hand, holding it and rubbing his thumb along the top of it.

"It's all good," he told her, then asked, "We good?"

"We're so good," she affirmed and lifting their entwined hands, she leaned in and kissed his. He waited until she lifted her face and quickly bent down to kiss her lightly.

"And?"

"You're good, I'm good. And I'm starving, let's order dinner," she smiled.

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"I really need to walk that dinner off," Grace laughed as they left the restaurant hand in hand.

"I was hoping you'd say that," Spencer confessed. It was slightly chilly although it was a clear and starry night. He had on his suit jacket but carried his longer overcoat over one arm. Grace shivered involuntarily as they walked up the street and he paused, bringing her to a stop as well. He held the overcoat out, opening it to help Grace into it and then they resumed walking, with her now snuggled in his overcoat and under his shoulder.

"So. We talked about the weather. The Smithsonian. Which Doctor was the best one, and I'm not done with that argument yet by the way. And my new job, my first day at work," she began.

He acknowledged her, "I'm happy the new job is working out for you. And I still think the fourth Doctor—" he teased, deliberately letting the words die midsentence. He held her hand just a little tighter as they crossed the street.

"Your mother is settling in wonderfully. She's already made a couple of friends. Other literature lovers. She misses you, no doubt, she mentioned you several times, to anyone who'd listen. And Iris and Maureen had her out in the courtyard today. We went for a little walk too."

"She's adapting. Mom's resilient. She's got Alzheimer's but she's not gonna let that stop her from doing things she loves. The road won't stop for her, she'll just take the next fork and go on."

"Just like you. Spencer, tell me about _your_ day. Last night was your first night alone in your apartment since you brought your mother here from Houston. And didn't you go back to the office today too?"

He nodded, "Yes. On both accounts. I slept in my own bed for the first time since late January. It was a little weird at first, with no one else being there. No guards. No Security Detail. But it felt really good. Best night's sleep since, well, January." He released a contented sigh and continued, "And my first full day back at the office. Umm," he made a face.

"What is it?"

"I couldn't remember something."

"I don't understand?"

"I went in one day last week and spent a couple of hours mapping something out about a case. Doing the geographic profile," he began. "And that map was still all set out this morning when I was there. But I couldn't remember what my train of thought was; I don't remember _what_ I was trying to figure out. I have an eidetic memory. And I couldn't remember what I was doing with that map."

"Aw, Spencer, that's the concussion wreaking havoc," she sympathised, bringing her free hand up and laying it against his chest.

"I want to say it's ironic, but it's actually more _frustrating_ because," he paused for a moment to let another couple pass them on the sidewalk and then explained, "What if what I'm not remembering is the key to that case?" He covered the hand she'd put on his chest with his free hand and gave it a squeeze.

"It'll come to you, Spencer," she tried to reassure him, and then another thought occurred to her. "Clear your mind of it, and concentrate on something else. Something will trigger it and then you'll remember."

"I hope you're right. And I hope it's soon!"

They walked for another block in companionable silence and stopped at the intersection, waiting for the light to change. Grace leaned her head against him in response to him tightening his arm around her shoulder.

"Oh, I passed my firearms requalification this morning too," he remembered. "Emily reinstated me last week, and gave me back my gun, but I had to pass requal first and now that's done."

"You're set then, to go back out in the field?'

"Uh huh," he responded.

"How about emotionally, mentally, Spencer? Are you ready?" She asked the question almost reluctantly and he immediately perceived it in the tone of her voice. Reflecting for a moment himself on how difficult the past year had been, he gave her hand another squeeze and forged ahead.

"It's okay," he assured her. "I'm putting it behind me, Grace. Yeah, it was a tough year but I'd like to think I'm past that. I'm free again. I've grown. And learned a little about myself and about, well, _life._ Wrong and right. Friends and family. Move forward. Journey on."

"Glad to hear that."

"I'm back."

"Better than ever," she asserted.

"Everything's falling back into alignment for me," he smiled at her, "My job, my freedom, my life," he paused to emphasise that, implying that he meant her and she stopped in her tracks. She slid her free arm up around his neck and reached up to kiss him, standing on her toes to accomplish this. He dropped her hand that he'd been holding to wrap both arms around her and pull her closer against him.

"And that," he added, a little breathlessly, after she finally broke off the kiss a long moment later.

"And that," she repeated, suddenly feeling very warm under his coat and embrace.

He released her from the hug and once again took her hand, resuming their walk back towards her apartment. Grace wondered if it would be premature in their relationship to be inviting him in for coffee. Or something, she thought silently, smiling at the _something_ that crossed her mind. She didn't want to appear too forward, too eager to accelerate their relationship. But neither did she want him to think she wasn't interested.

They reached Grace's apartment building and she took a deep breath, trying to decide whether or not to ask him in. He let go of her hand as she dug through her pocket looking for her keycard. Finding it, she swiped the access lock and Spencer pulled the door open for her.

His iPhone beeped a text alert. Their eyes met and she asked,

"Shouldn't you check that?"

He nodded his head and pulled the device from his pocket, swiped it on and read the text. It was from Prentiss. He sighed, smiled, sighed again and showed the screen to Grace.

"We have a case."

"You're being called away,"

"I am," he agreed, and discovered he was feeling the rush of anticipation and excitement he always felt when the team had a new case. It felt a little different this time, he noted, and then he realised it was not just the case that was captivating him. "I gotta go," he told her, taking her hand, "Can I call you as soon as we get back?"

"I'll be waiting for it," she promised.

He chewed his lower lip for a second as the iPhone beeped again, and then he bent down and sweetly kissed her.

"As soon as I get back," he affirmed, reluctantly letting go of her hand and disappearing into the night.

Grace stood at the apartment building entrance for a long moment watching as he retreated from view down the street. Finally, she turned and as she walked through the door towards the elevator bay, she realised she was still wearing his coat. A smile crossed her face as she buried her face in it, inhaling his scent and instantly knowing she'd be sleeping with this coat until he returned to reclaim it.

 _"_ _The best way out is always through,"-_ Robert Frost

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